Advisory to Americans Traveling to Slovenia

by Borut Prah (borut@prah.net), 2001

 

 

It makes a total sense that Americans prefer to reach Slovenia from the west.  You can check out from Palazzo Gritti in Venice, traverse Slovenia and check into The Imperial Hotel in Vienna on the same day.  Or you can overnight in Slovenia.  Its best hotel is Tito’s villa at lake Bled, now a Relais & Chateaux member, a cross of Ahwanee with charm of a KGB Hospital.  But the setting almost matches Yosemite. 

 

Slovenia measures 170 miles from border to border at its widest point.  By the time you reach lake Bled from Venice, in three hours of autostrada, you are ten miles away from Austria.  Just remember to avoid the early afternoon traffic jam in the capitol Ljubljana.  Since the recent demise of Marxist methods of transportation (shoes, trams, buses, and bikes) it has more cars than residents. 

 

Slovenia is so little known because the place was obscured by communist Yugoslavia for the last fifty years.  It was not always like this.  Slovenia, under the name of Carantania or Carinthia, was for over five hundred years an integral part of the Austrian Empire, with the same living standard and culture. 

 

Do not expect any visible change when entering Slovenia, such as you would see when crossing an American border into Mexico.  During three thousand years of known history the borders have been moved between east and west  almost one hundred times.  Such slicing of territory created a cultural and ethnic mix so similar that most picture postcards you buy in North-eastern Italy can be used in Slovenia or Austria and most people will not even know the difference. 

 

The differences, however, are below the surface and these are worthy for Americans to know.  More about this later.  First, some ancient history. 

 

The 21st century Republic of Slovenia covers the eastern half of the territory along the Eastern Alps that Venedi settled some three thousand years ago.  Venedi lived in a kingdom called Norricum.  Venedi’s neighbors were Etruscans who lived in Etruria, another great country of that age. Both had a similar language and alphabet and left us some fabulous art.  Also, both were very good at high technology, which in pre-silicon age meant forging metals.  Both kingdoms exported their products with great profit and therefore lived far better then their Third World neighbors down south in Latio. 

 

With help of Etruscan technology, Latio’s Latins eventually conquered the Etruscan capital Rome and called themselves Romans.  Then they occupied Etruria even before Etruscans could get out of their fine hot tubs and even better wine cellars.  Eventually Romans did the same to Venedi and that’s why people in Verona and Venezia now speak Italian and not Venedian.  Next, the Romans marched to the east.  Most Etruscans and Venedi (aka Venetians) became Romans, but some did not and preferred to retreat deep into Alpine valleys to wait for better times.   These were the optimists.  Many centuries passed and eventually Latini too grew fond of hot tubs and fine wines.  The rest you know from the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire. 

 

While the Empire was collapsing, Slavs advanced from the North and the East.  They moved into the Alpine valleys, where Roman authorities had neither interest nor power, and mixed with the remaining Venedi.  We know about this from the toponyms, names given to mountains and rivers that retained the meaning in the current Slovenian language but mean nothing in Italian or German language.  For example, Slovenian word for a cliff and an oven is the same - pec.  There are cliffs all over the Dolomites – and most of them are called forno, the word for oven in Italian.  Oven?  In some cases like Cortina d’Ampezzo, the pec was simply converted into pezzo.   Anyway, the resulting  mix, Slo-venians, now live as Italians on the lands east of Venice, as Austrians on the lands west of Vienna, and as Slovenians in the middle.  Thus, as you travel you will cross three different languages spoken by one ethnic group with identical customs, and other obvious signs, such as architecture.

 

Venice is closer to any point in Slovenia than lake Tahoe is from San Francisco.  You can do just a day trip to sniff the mountain air of Slovenia.  An overnight trip is probably enough, unless you want to take a closer look at the country or play golf.  Slovenia gets a lot of rain since the west to east weather movement is obstructed by the Eastern Alps that arch down from Austria.  Thus, grass grows easier there and golf courses have sprung all over after Slovenia joined market economy in 1992.  So have tennis courts, despite of snow and ice in winter and many rainy days in summer.  The game of tennis had a temporary setback when the Communist Party in 1945 declared it a game of capitalists.   Soon after the Davis cup team took a political asylum in Egypt and scattered all over the world as tennis pros.  It took three decades for tennis to return; a Slovenian girl Mima Jauševec won Roland Garros in 1977 while Slovenian coach Breskvar was coaching two juniors named Boris Becker and Steffi Graf.

But return of tennis did not portend return of freedom and capitalism.  For another fifteen years, in this 98% Catholic country Christmas remained outlawed and the restaurants were still government owned.  Now, Christmas is back and restaurants are plenty, all privately owned, so service and food are good again. Slovenian cuisine is in the middle of a food spectrum spanning from Italian-light to Austrian-heavy, depending how far you are from Venice or Vienna when you eat.  There is no real ethnic food, however, Slovenia could not avoid the Yugoslavian influence of last 80 years, so some food can be strictly “Balkans”.

 

Slovenia is a very photogenic country.  Baroque churches often sit on top of hills, towns are immaculately clean with houses that go back centuries. There are two opera houses that have supplied some fine talent to Vienna opera, two universities that teach no feel-good curriculum, and the oldest symphony hall in the world. 

 

All this you will see and may conclude – there is nothing wrong with socialism.  Until you realize that all the nice things that you found were created before 1945, the year when the communists took over. 

 

In Slovenia, socialist government, like everywhere else, ran economy into the ground.  Americans have only limited experiences in such matters: Post office, Amtrak, Public Schools and State of California Energy Policy are but rare examples.  Not so in Slovenia.  If you are not convinced ask to be shown some “victory of socialism” and you may be looking at some big factories that now sit empty because nobody bought their products.  The government owned everything and its officials decided what will be produced.  Huge taxes were needed to construct these “victories” and the most creative people simply stopped working, left the country or simply behaved as “they pretend to pay us and we pretend to work”.  Thus, the country was defaulted to the least able people and slipped into the Third World status from which has still not completely recovered.  Before the World War II the wages in Slovenia were about 80% of those in Italy or Austria.  From 1945 to 1990 they were 30% at best, but they are now catching up due to one major mistake that the Communists made.  It’s called Education Paradox.

 

European Communists believed in providing everyone with good education,  especially in sciences.  They assumed that educated population would increase their power.  Surprise!  The educated people left Slovenia as soon as the Iron Curtain lifted and even those who stayed or were kept in by it could no longer be controlled.  This error, coupled with some solid pressure from America, was a major factor for the demise of the communist bloc from Albania to Siberia.

Today, an American traveling to Eastern Europe can observe the fiasco of the Big Government economics and the lunacy of Marxism, although traces are vanishing fast. In Slovenia, they are almost invisible.  A visitor to Slovenia in the new millennium will now conclude that socialism is dead.  Yet, socialism is appearing in most unexpected places, even in America.  Today, the members of Socialist International (http://dsausa.org/dsanews/index.html) count among them over fifty members of US Congress (our “own” Nancy Pelosi, Pete Stark, Barbara Lee et al.).  

 

Socialists International, which is now the haven of most defunct communist leaders from Eastern Europe, is well aware that communism lost power because its educated population could not be controlled.  A theory to regain power without force has hence evolved.  This peaceful road to power is the creation of dependent (read helpless and dumb) population.  The place to start is to teach children to feel good, to have self esteem, to know nothing.  Give them entertainment, moral relativism, and tell them there is no difference between right and wrong. 

 

Success is forthcoming. American schools already rank among the lowest in the industrial world.  The new Left learned well from the Communists’ mistake.  No revolution is needed.  Incrementally raise taxes so you can employ in government jobs more and more dumb citizens whom you created stupid by degrading their education.  With tax revenues, grow the government and one day the government will run everything, just as it did in Slovenia, USSR, et al.

 

Slovenia recovered, thanks to American help and the education mistake that Communists made.  But who will help America when its own dumbed down grownups attain the critical mass?  This is the lesson that you can take home from Slovenia while also having some good time.